I’ve been a little out of commission these past few days. We celebrated Lakyn’s 5th birthday, went to the Parade of Lights at Zilker Park, and various other things that have kept me busy.
Lakyn had a wonderful birthday. I had a sense of guilt because every year she’s always had a big extravagant party with tons of friends and family but since we’ve recently moved away from said friends and family, she had a small birthday this year with us and her two cousins that live here. She kept asking when her “party” was. But all in all, I really think she had a wonderful time. We went to Jungle Java which is her new favorite place. She asks to go there everyday. We had lunch with daddy downtown and I took her to Walmart and let her pick out all the stuff for her birthday cake which she helped bake and decorate. It was a great day.
Then we went to the Parade of Lights at Zilker Park and it was amazing! It was like going to the fair but with Christmas lights galore. They even had funnel cake. Yum! The kids really enjoyed themselves and I felt like a kid while we were there. I think it’s good to let your inner child that’s filled with imagination surface every once in a while. It’s good for the soul.
Several things happened this weekend that made me really appreciate being a mother but also value motherhood in general. I know that I never truly understood my mother until I had children of my own. Since that time, I have such a great respect for her.
While we were at Jungle Java, a little girl fell on one of the slides. Fell hard. Like the entire place heard the thud followed by the cry of the hurt girl. I found it absolutely fascinating that simply from the sound of the cry, the mother instantly knew that it was her little girl who was hurt. I think to most, crying just sounds like crying. But to mothers, each child has a distinct cry that makes them recognizable. The mother immediately rushed over, picked up her little girl and began to caress and comfort her and I was in complete awe of this beautiful, raw moment. She possessed the correct touch and soothing voice to comfort her child instantly. It was pretty impressive.
Then I read a blog, themommyblog.net, and was amazed again. She talked about how they were really hard on money right now and how she had gotten a disconnect notice from the water company and she hadn’t eaten all day as to “preserve” the food for the kids since they were out of school for the holidays.
I could totally relate to her situation. Lord knows we’ve had our share of financial difficulty and my heart went out to her because I know exactly how she’s feeling. And I thought about how remarkable it was that she would deny herself nourishment to save it for her children. Completely selfless.
These things just got me thinking about how truly honoring it is to be a mother and sometimes we don’t even know it. Sometimes, actually more often never, are we acknowledged for it. It’s just what we do. We beat up on ourselves and wonder if we’re really doing whats right by our kids but I think it’s the little things that matter. It’s us recognizing our child’s cry in a room full of 100 children. It’s the little sacrifices we make so that our kids can have the absolute best we can offer.
Watching and reading about these mothers this weekend just made me proud to call myself a mommy and put myself in the same “boat” as these amazing women. They are inspirational. They are mothers.
You are such an exceptional little girl. From the moment I found out I was pregnant with you I knew you were special.
You gave mommy a heck of a time during pregnancy but every bit of it was worth it. You are remarkable.
You have the most beautiful face I’ve ever seen. Pearly white, flawless skin and crystal blue eyes that light up like stars. You have a smile bright enough to lighten up any dark mood or room.
You are a humongous ball of energy. Honestly, sometimes I just cannot keep up with you. I wish I could. I wish I had the drive to enjoy life to the fullest the way you do. Life with you never includes a dull moment.
You are such an amazing older sister. Even now, while playing at the playground you’re standing up for your younger brother. You have such a nurturing spirit and there is no doubt in my mind that you will one day (in the far away future) make an excellent mother.
Even though at times it’s an extreme challenge, I love your independence. It gives me confidence that you’re in fact a leader not a follower and I trust you’ll lead in the right direction.
I love you more than words can say. You’re my pookie pie sunshine.
I feel like a total failure today.
First, I was procrastinating doing anything productive by watching the videos on Momversation, which I’ve become totally addicted to. It makes me feel like I’m some part of a mommy community and I’m best friends with all these people I’ve never met. It’s mommy crack.
Anyway, Holden starts crying because he got hit with a soccer ball. Please understand that crying occurs at my house about every 10 seconds so I don’t really jump up at every “Whaaaaaaaa”. I paused my video and told him to come here and quickly assessed him. No blood or bumps so I told him “You’re okay. Suck it up. Why don’t you sit right here and play with this toy?”. He quickly quit crying and became distracted with the toy and I turned around and resumed watching my video.
About 5 minutes later, Lakyn comes into the kitchen and says “Oh my gosh, Holden’s bleeding!!”. Sure enough, the child has a bloody nose. Ugh. I feel awful. I was so preoccupied with this video that I didn’t even notice his nose was bleeding.
He is okay though. We didn’t have to make any rushes to the ER so I guess that’s good. Just a wet paper towel to clean him up and he was good as new. But I’m torn to pieces inside. I definitely will not be winning the “Mother of the Year” award for this one. Fail….
Every weekend, I find myself completely exhausted. I’ve spent the whole week wrangling kids and I’m just pooped. And all I want to do is sleep in.
Apparently, my husband is also exhausted from his week of work because it never fails come Saturday and Sunday, we find ourselves in a “sleep off”.
I’m sure you know what I’m talking about. You wake up to the sound of lively unsupervised children terrorizing the house. Yet you stay in bed, pretending to be dead asleep, anxiously awaiting for the other parent to get up out of bed and take care of the kids so you can sleep in.
Sometimes, I get lucky and the kids will run into the room yelling “Daddy! Daddy! Get up! We want donuts!”. And he’s forced at their hand to get up out of bed while I pretend to be completely lifeless so I can catch a few more zzzzzz’s. Other times, I’m not so lucky.
It really is a skill you have to work hard to master, pretending to be asleep. You can’t make any movements to suggest that you might possibly be awake or it’s all over. No sounds or you’re screwed. TJ and I have had about 5 years of practice so we’ve gotten to be pretty good at it.
Sometimes on those weekend mornings when I’ve “lost” the sleep off, I’ll look at TJ and be like “Faker. I know you’re totally awake loser”. And I’ll see a little twinge of a smile to confirm but alas, he won the battle so I give him another hour or so before I send the kids in to jump on the bed. That’s fair, right?
Today, I took the kids to the Austin Children’s Museum. It was awesome!!! They had so many neat little toys that were educational and gave me the morning off to hang out. I liked playing with the toys as much as the kids. The only rough part was trying to keep the two together. We managed. I will say Lakyn was a little disappointed they didn’t have any giant slides but I think she sets her expectations a little high.
On to other things…
I follow this blog, barefootfoodie.com, and she is freaking hilarious. I have to say that it brings me a little bit of peace to know that I’m not the only one that has those kinds of thoughts or weird situations happen to them. Anyway, while reading her blog I found that one of her blogger friends—Anissa—has recently suffered a stroke. She’s in her twenties with 3 kids. Holy Crap. My heart just broke. Come to find out, her youngest child was diagnosed with leukemia, however is in remission so that’s wonderful news.
So I was nonetheless touched by the story. I went to her blog and found that her husband has been keeping updates on hope4peyton.org about her status. It’s truly been a miracle. She’s making progress. And though I’ve never even remotely met this woman, my heart goes out to her and her family. It makes my little annoyances seem trivial.
Alright. Before I write this I feel it’s important to give a quick disclaimer:
I love and adore my children more than anything in the whole world. They give me such joy and make me laugh when I feel terrible. They are so cute and cuddly and energetic and I feel like often times I can’t tell them how much I love them enough. Long story short, I LOVE MY KIDS!
Okay. Now that I’ve stated that, I am going to rant for a bit.
I think raising children is like raising wild animals indoors. Seriously. They really are icky, sticky, gooey little creatures that you have difficulty potty training. I am so sick of pee. My poor daughter goes non-stop all day long. So when she finally passes out to go to bed, or on rare occasion take a nap, she tends to have accidents. Honestly, I kinda think it’s a little laziness as she has gone about 2 weeks before without peeing her bed and she wants to wear pullups so she can feel like a baby. I tried to nix the pullups for a while but you can only take so many days of washing pee stained sheets before you give up. So for now, she wears pullups to bed. Except yesterday at quiet time.
We were all exhausted from a crazy night before of constantly getting out of bed and putting the kids back in their beds and needless to say, we ALL needed a nap. So I put Holden to bed, laid on the chair and a half, and Lakyn laid on the couch to rest. And she had an accident. She peed on my couch. Ugh. So I guess I’m gonna have to figure out a way to wash the cushion because after 1/2 a hour of scrubbing, it still smells like a pee filled pool when I walk in my living room. I guess I’m just gonna Febreze the crap out of it until I can figure it out.
Speaking of bedtime, I thought I was solid. I mean I worked really hard to “train” the kids to stay in their beds once we’ve put them to bed. We’ve always had a little bit of trouble with Lakyn because she’s a big ball of pure energy, but Holden was golden. I could lay that kid down and he’d be out like a light for the entire night in about 10 minutes. It was awesome. Then we moved…
Holden came into our room after we’d gone to bed. I don’t know if it was his cute pudgy little face or the fact that we were half asleep but TJ let him sleep with us that night and it’s been a battle ever since. Actually, he was allowed to sleep with us for a couple of weeks. I can’t say I really put up much of a fight. In fact, I think I always avoided having the kids sleep with us because I knew I would love cuddling with them so much. However, TJ had enough and now we spend about 2 hours each night returning Holden to his bed about 20 times before he gives up and finally goes to sleep in his room. It’s tiresome. He’s even figured out that if he waits until about 10 min after jammies and we’ve put him in his bed to poop, we are forced to change him and it buys him more time. Pretty smart little turkey.
Did I mention I do LOVE my children? Ok, good.
I’m not sure why but lately both kids have developed quite a sassy mouth. For instance, the other day TJ told Holden to pick up toys and Holden yelled “NNOOOO!” at TJ. TJ paused for a minute and said “You don’t tell me no. Pick up toys”. Holden then said “NNNNNNNN” and we both waited for the rest of it (If you’ve ever met Holden, you know that when he gets excited or upset, he tends to stutter and stammer), “NNNNNNNevermind” and he went on to pick up toys. TJ and I both had to hide our faces from laughing because it was pretty cute. But really? Already this kinda sass from a 2 1/2 year old?
Lakyn’s getting a little big for her britches too (Oh geez, I totally just made it readily apparent I’m from the south!). Like yesterday in the car, we went to pick up some donuts from Round Rock Donuts, the best donuts you’ll ever eat in your life. I had to pick up a prescription afterward and both of the kids were crazy in the car. They were unbuckling seat belts, yelling, just being really ugly. So I said “Okay, when we get home you both need to go to your rooms. No donuts”. I was trying to keep my cool because the drive up Pharmacy had one of those camera things so you can see the person when they answer your call button and the last thing I needed was them to record me doing something stupid and wind up on the news like ones of those crazy moms in the Wal-mart parking lot. But Lakyn responds “I don’t care. Whatever”. Say WHAT?!?
So, I’ve got my hands full. Literally, I’m keeping soap on hand for the sassy moments. I just feel like I’ve gotta get a grip on this before she’s 16 or something.
Wow, so that feels good to get off my chest. And even though it may not sound like it, I truly do adore my Lakyn and Holden. I feel so blessed to stay home with them and watch them develop into these amazing little people. My life was incomplete before they were here. And as much as I say “I need a break”, the second they’re gone I instantly want them back. That’s what love is, isn’t it? Putting up with each other even when we’re not at our best? The hard thing about this is that I’ve gotta try to help sculpt them and guide them to be awesome people. I hope TJ and I can live up to the job. Really though, I think we’ve done pretty good so far.
Holy cow! I haven’t blogged since May. I knew it’d been a while but I didn’t realized it’d been that long. Geez. Well to my defense, I’ve had many life changing events happen since then that have occupied my time and any brain activity I have. Let’s see, where do I begin?
Oh yes, we’re preggo! Not so much we as me but I feel like I should include TJ in the mix since he did play a part in making the baby. Yes folks, the Taylor family will now be a table of five not four. I will admit this came as quite a shock to us as this was entirely unplanned but as we all know, God often has a plan of his own and we must trust it. So we waited about a month before announcing anything to our family and friends so we could wrap our minds around it. I’m still not sure I’ve got my mind around it but I’m getting excited to meet this little person. I’ve felt the baby move and it was going crazy. TJ actually got a high five. But I guess it’s on a vacation because I haven’t felt any significant movements in a few days. It’s still early. I’m 16 weeks along. I went to my new OBGYN (I’ll get to that in a minute) and I LOVE him!! Because I’ve already had 4, yes count them, UTI’s since I’ve been pregnant he’s putting me on a preventative medication. Thank you JESUS!! I cannot tell you how happy that makes me. If you’re a woman whose ever had a UTI, you know how utterly miserable they are. Let alone one a month for the past four months. YIKES! Also, since Lakyn and Holden were both born early (36 weeks) and I’ve began feeling contractions, he felt it best that I start Progesterone injections once a week to stop preterm labor. Not so excited about the injections, but I do feel relief that I don’t have to worry about that business.
Lakyn and Holden are excited about the baby. I’m not sure Holden really understands but Lakyn is thrilled about being to boss around another little one. She kisses my tummy and asks about the baby and how I’m feeling each day. She is going to be such an awesome helper and little mommy. I think that pretty much catches us up on the whole baby situation.
What’s next? We’ve MOVED!!
Everything happened crazy fast. TJ applied for some jobs in the Austin area and 2 weeks later, we live here. Insane? Yes. We moved to Round Rock TX which is just north of Austin mid November (This is the reason for the new OBGYN). It’s been great. I have to admit I was pretty nervous but TJ and I prayed together and knew that this is what the Lord had for us. TJ works as a Designer for HomeAway, which specializes in vacation rental homes around the world. It’s pretty awesome. Let’s just say, he LOVES his job. He loves the people he works with, the creative environment, the fact that he can wear what he wants to work….everything. Which makes me happy. I will say the one thing that sucks is he has to commute each day which takes about 30 minutes each way. So that kinda blows but all the pros of the situation make up for it.
Like we have insurance. We haven’t had health insurance in over 5 years. I feel completely legit now when at the doctors office I can throw down my insurance card. Check it. It’s real. I’m covered. Yesssssss.
So I’m gonna post a few pictures of the new house. It’s beautiful. Our landlords are fabulous. I will admit though that I only took pictures of the clean rooms to post. The bedrooms pics will just have to wait…
I’ll post one of the front of the house later. It’s kinda rainy and I don’t want to put my shoes on! Well I have about a million other things to write about like how I get to stay home with the kiddos and how that’s working out and adjusting to life in a new place, but the children and very quiet and that concerns me. So I guess I better go see what’s destroyed.
Until next time… (which really will be soon because honestly I need a hobby to occupy my time)